My Son, the Wolf Man, Rages Against Gmail

I do not draw.  However, I had my light box out the other day for Anders to trace a map of South America for Spanish class, and thought I'd experiment with tracing a photo I'd taken of Lars in my car, sipping his favorite Starbucks beverage.  At first I thought I'd done a pretty good job, except that he looks like he's had his eyebrows waxed.  Lars looked at my tracing and said, "I look like I have a beard, Mom!"  So much for my sad attempt at shadowing.  If I added little points to his ears, he'd look like a wolf man with a Starbucks habit.


Okay, since I'm embarrassing Lars today, he requested a rant about how Google ruined his day today.  I'm going to copycat The Empress, who lets her son dictate blog posts about whatever's on his mind.  Take it away, Lars-of-Ours!

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Okay, so at the end of the day at school, I was on my Gmail account when suddenly a little pop-up box appeared in the middle of the screen.  It asked me when I was born, so I told it.  All of a sudden, my Inbox disappeared and in its place was a box saying that because I was not over 13 years old, in 3 days my account will be permanently deleted!  It said that if I wish to keep my Gmail account I would have to tell them my credit card number (I don't even own a credit card!) so they could fine me thirty cents.  [Mom is raising an incredulous eyebrow of suspicion right now.]  I am SO MAD at Gmail that I wanted to hack into their web site, but my friend stopped me just in time.  [Note from Mom: No way can Lars hack into Google's web site, or anyone else's.  Mom is having trouble letting Lars talk without interrupting...] 

Now, I have a Yahoo! account, but when I created it they asked me when I was born.  I was so desperate for an email account that I told it I was born in 1990.  I will never use Google again and I hope you don't either.  From, Lars the Obliterator.  --Wait, no!  Lars the Conqueror!  I'm the conqueror!  Goodbye for now, and DON'T USE GOOGLE!  Ever!

[More notes from Mom: the irony is, of course, that Lars is ranting about Google through Blogger, which is just Evil Google in Disguise].  Lars again, with eyebrows shooting up to the moon: "It IS?!!!"